Oh, times are changing.

One thing that you'll learn about me, or maybe you won't idk, is that I have such a hard time with change.

I don't mean change in the sense of physical change. I enjoy moving often and being in new situations. What I can't take, is when people change or more importantly when relationships change.

I don't care if my best friend becomes a completely different person but if our friendship is affected and we're not as close as we were before, it literally kills me.

And it's kind of ironic because I always kind of didn't really care about people. What I mean by that is that I didn't have a hard time letting people out of my life. If someone annoyed me or got on my nerves, it was very easy for me to decide that I just didn't want to be friends with them anymore.

But now, post Uwp life, I just want to maintain relationships because friendships are just so important and people who love you, when you can't do anything for them, are people who you want in your life.

I just get so nervous, with all this moving business, I'm scared that I'll visit my friends from home and things will be different. Or I'll see a friend that I traveled with that I haven't seen in six months and we won't have the deep connection or bond that we had with each other when we were on the road.

My heart literally hurts when I think about not having some people in my life. It scares me so bad, and people say that if someone walks out of your life then you should let them go because they never wanted to be there in the first place, and I don't believe that at all.

I've walked out of peoples lives and lucky for me I was able to walk back into their lives once I realized that I didn't know if I wanted to live life without them. There are people that I miss all the time because I wasn't strong enough to stay and work on our relationship, instead I just walked away.

I think that if someone walks out of your life and you don't want them to leave then you should swallow your pride and try and get them back. Then after you try and you make a fool out of yourself and you risk everything, if they don't come back then at least you know you tried.

I don't really know where I'm going with this, and now I"m crying.....I"m just scared. I know so many wonderful people and I hope that I'm blessed to have them in my life forever.

People say that maybe some people are only meant to be in your life for a season, but I want this season to last the rest of my life.

I just love the people that are in my life and I hope they know how much they all mean to me, every single last one of them. I would do anything for them and I'm just the luckiest girl in the world to say that I'm surrounded by such gorgeous and amazing people.

Sleep well readers. I love you....and I mean it.